You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
