My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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