Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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