I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Randomize
