Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
And my parents said I crawled through the house
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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