i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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