I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Randomize