Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
