apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
