Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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