I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
