In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
