How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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