How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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