Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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