Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
