Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
