When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
