hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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