do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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