I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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