Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
