We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
