At least make sure they are 18
Why
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize