I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
