maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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