I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
false alarm. still invincible.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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