If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
