This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
