There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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