Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize