Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Your cock deserves a montage
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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