I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
