HIV tests are more positive than that guy
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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