You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Randomize
