But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
