Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
