You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
