they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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