actually, I'm a sock model
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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