Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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