I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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