They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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