You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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