have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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