so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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