Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
