so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
