I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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