i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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