Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
